Not Responsible

It's hard to find a parking lot where the business hasn't posted a sign announcing they are not responsible, be it for theft, vandalism, or general mayhem.  Well, good for them!  I think I'll do that, too.  I can put a bumper sticker on my car saying I'm not responsible for anything that might happen while driving and texting to my friends about how drunk I am, or anything else for that matter.  I could put a sign on my house saying I'm not responsible for any accidents or violent attacks by pets or in-laws.  Or I can just put a sign on my back – or even better!  a tattoo! – that says I'm not responsible for anything.  Ever.  "Yes, your honour, I did run those nuns off the road, which set the orphanage on fire, all while running from the police after robbing the Git N Gone, but see the tattoo?"

Here's the thing, folks.  Just because you say you're not responsible doesn't mean you're not.  If anything, it means you know a problem exists, which should make you even more responsible.  You know that a customer's car is probably going to be broken into before she even gets to the door, but instead of improving your security you stick up a lousy sign.  I'm sure that brings comfort to your customers.  "Yeah, my car's been stolen, but at least the store's not responsible.  Boy, I wouldn't want that.  I would hate that they'd have to do anything more to ensure my safety while shopping here than to put up a lousy sign."

And while we're at it, putting up a sign saying that you "reserve the right to refuse service to anyone" doesn't mean you have that right.  "Nope.  We don't serve Blacks, Asians, Hispanics, Native Americans, Non-Native Americans, Episcopalians, Libertarians, Jews, Jehovah Witnesses, anybody with an accent, Southern Europeans, Northern Europeans, or anybody named 'Jim.'  And I have that right.  I got a sign that says so.  And if you make a fuss, I'll shoot you.  I won't be responsible for that, either."