Mrs. Hobson was a spy.
She had sonar and radar
and all sorts of stuff set up everywhere
she used to know where any kid
in the neighborhood was,
and exactly what he was doing there.
And she had a telephone
that would instantly dial any mother
and let her in on the secret, too.

It was rumored Mrs. Hobson
had alarms that would go off
if a kid even started to climb her fence.
If a guy came anywhere near
to stepping on one of her billion flowers,
he'd probably set off a landmine,
and if he didn't,
Mrs. Hobson would certainly shoot him -
maybe.
It was rumored she had once pulled a gun
on someone's big brother.
It was true, though,
Mrs. Hobson would use her instant telephone.